you can't always get what you want.

Great song, great message. I haven't blogged in over a year but am about to embark on some pretty drastic life changes in the coming months and thought why not blog about it. Thats what a blog is for right? Sorting feelings, updating the world on your inner turmoil, helping you to better understand why you do things or don't do things. I will warn you, this isn't my normal funny observation of life, this is not that, but it is what it is and I hope you will still read.

Looking back at my previous posts it is clear to anyone that I have had a great time living here in Chicago for the past 8 years. In an average week I laugh about a million times, I have endless access to culture and new experiences at my finger tips, I have great friends, and I live in a city that is both huge and small all at once. One might ask me, why are you even considering giving all of that up? I once had a good friend that told me "it doesn't matter how many great things you have in your life you will always want something unobtainable and it will drive you nuts. You have to sacrifice and sometimes that is just too hard to do." It's the whole theory behind the Rolling Stones song, "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need." That's the answer to the question why am I giving up what I have in Chicago. I am getting what I need. I need a career that means more than a paycheck, I need a life close to the people that matter the most, my family, and most importantly I need to grow up.

Most people don't get what its like going to school in a big city like Chicago, New York or L.A. and then immediately going to work in that same city. I always tell my friends who say I am crazy for wanting to trade Chicago for Kansas City the same thing "I have lived Chicago out, what you all forget is that while you were in Lawrence, Columbia, Manhattan, wherever I was here and have been here for 8 years." Imagine for one moment living in your college town for the rest of your life (no matter how big or small) it makes it hard to move on and gain new experiences.

In the end I honestly don't know what I will do, I know I have to make a decision in December, there is a lot on the table, moving back home and starting grad school, staying here and working another year at a meaningless job just to try and live out college for one more year, or who knows the peace corps have been looking good at the moment.

The bottom line is this, I am stuck, stuck in a meaningless redundant life. I do the same thing every damn day for no greater purpose or meaning. That my friends is one thing that I don't want to continue. I need something to change, I need something worth living in the redundancy, I may not be able to get what I want but I sure as hell hope to get what I need.

Thoughts, opinions, questions all are welcome.

"Anyone else think the Kanye sunglasses are kinda stupid? If I see any more hipster 12-year-olds with them I'm going to step on them."-Rex Chekal

Lollapalooza weekend, one of my favorite added bonuses of living in Chicago is the cost effective opportunity to see a lot of the bands I enjoy hearing right in the comfort of my backyard. Unfortunately the cold hard truth of being 25 hit me like a ton of bricks this weekend as I walked through a crowd hating on every day glow teeshirt, american apparel flashy tub top, and frat dog teeshirts wanting to take each person out preferably with the ability to snap my fingers and make them disappear or at least mute. Knowing I didn't want to drink and be hungover and hot for three days also proved as Helen E. would say "we are too old for this shit" but also provided an opportunity for me to better study great new bands out there.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate all hipsters and Kanye West lovers/ neon enthusiast, I just hate every trend done to an extreme. (Ehhmmm Girlicious Blayne from Project Runway anyone) I do hate annoying teens that mosh during Wilco or disregard basic festival etiquette. If you want to come hang with the big kids, do some research. Know the type of crowd that hits up certain shows, know that when you and your 5 best girlfriends plow through the crowd of people who have been waiting for hours to see a show (all the while screeching at the top of the lungs) know that I will want to trip you up for your complete lack of respect.

Now I am not some grinch who doesn't respect the fact that I was once an annoying teen out of my league. But I would have had to save for months to come to this sort of event (and still do). I also wouldn't waste the experience by getting so wasted in 90* heat that I have to be carried out of a crowd.

Ok stepping off the soap box to give you my highlights for the weekend:

* Gogol Bordello, Yeasayer, Jamie Lidell, Wilco and Radiohead had some of the top shows in my opinion.
* I saw a teeshirt that read "Too fat to be a hipster", I immediately wanted to barter for the shirt of the kids back.
* The porta-potties weren't unbearable and the lines weren't ridiculous.
* I was impressed with the recycling efforts and the fair priced food, drinks, and water.
*Fireworks during "Fake Plastic Trees" incredible.
* All the parents that brought their little ones, what an awesome experience and kuddos to putting up with kids in the heat to educate your children about great music.
* Rage Against the Machine's Zack de la Rocha telling people to chill the f' out because it was completely unnecessary to tear shit up, in fact its just meat-head of you to do.
* Bands thanking Radiohead for the big crowds, hilarious, slightly sarcastic and yet genuinely respectful.
*Bloc Party's lead singer wearing a Obama teeshirt.
* And finally Perry for putting this whole concept in motion and having it in Chicago, gives all us midwest folk a chance to hear some great music in a great venue.

and its going to be a long long time...

Opps, forgot I had this wonderful blog. Sorry for the delay in posting.... hmmm where to begin, where to begin. Ahh, lets begin with the great news that today is a summer Friday. What is a summer Friday you might ask... well its the greatest thing to happen to working America ever, thats right ever. Summer Fridays are the prize among prizes for working America, if you are lucky enough you receive Fridays off, if you are fairly lucky you get a half day, if you work for jp morgan you don't get squat (I kid I kid, to all my corporate pals).

I am part of the fairly lucky. Those who get the half day on Fridays and I will take it. And as I enjoy these half days of freedom, I pledge to do something great with them. Like going to a museum for an example, riding a bike outside, going to the grocery store when no one else is there, who knows maybe even fit in a day drink or two. Speaking of day drinks I need to grab a Bellini form Quarntinos soon. If you live in Chicago you gotta try those suckers, sooo good.

As summer has arrived I am thoroughly excited to live in this great city. Street festivals and live music every weekend, farmers markets, beach parties, you name it. It is the reward for all chicagoans that make it through the bitter winter.

So as I embark on my first summer Friday and long weekend, I promise at least one tale of hilarity upon my return. Needless to say this adventure:
http://www.galoscaves.com/_en/strona_opisowa.php will ensure at least 9 or 10 tales from the weekend.

Until next time, don't you go changin.

eeeek

that is the sound of me freaking out! with 1 month to my deadline to raise 1,200.00 more dollars than the 600.00 I have raised for the Avon Walk, I am in a bit of trouble, I need to raise 400.00 a week in the next three weeks. Ahhh...

On another note, I moved in to my new place and might I say laundry is my new best friend, yay free laundry!

Beth

Laughing out loud in my cubicle and more Monday morning thoughts.

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/full-list-of-stuff-white-people-like/

This has made my entire Monday morning. Even though I had to wake up an hour earlier this morning (damn you daylight savings), this website has redeemed my reason for getting out of bed this morning. A couple of highlights that particularly made me laugh and then look around to make sure no one in my cubicle area saw me looking at a non-work related website.

From the website:
# 47 Art Degrees:

"White people can also take that degree and go to graduate school (future post) and eventually become a professor or adjunct professor where they will still require parental support.

If they are REALLY ambitious and need to make money, they can take that degree and go to Law School.

But the real reason white people need these degrees is so that they can sound smart at parties. Of course it trickles down to making connections, getting hired, knowing rich people, and so forth. But ultimately it all begins by saying “reading Henry James was the most rewarding part of undergrad.”"

# 38 Arrested Development (funny after my last post eh)

"If you are ever a white person’s house, and you see an orange box in their DVD collection, you should say “oh, you have Arrested Development, I love that show!” To which you will be offered a glass of wine, and perhaps an invitation to 80s night."

As a Chicagoan # 30 Wrigley Field is quite hilarious

"Liking the Cubs right now is trendy. They haven’t won a World Series since 1908, they are located on the North Side and celebrities like them. Bill Murray, John Cusak, and Hillary Clinton (although she flip flops between them and the Yankees) are all Cubs fans. One should keep up to date on things that are trendy in order to befriend more white people. ie) eating expensive Indian food, shopping Organic, or going on a wild rose detox. So for the upcoming season, try to know at least one player on the Chicago Cubs and defend Mark Prior at all costs."

and lastly but certainly one of the best picks:

#72 Study Abroad:

"It is also important that you understand the study abroad ranking system. Europe/Australia form the base level, then Asia, then South America, and finally the trump card of studying abroad in Tibet. Then there is the conversation killer of studying abroad in Africa. If you studied in Africa, it is usually a good idea to keep it quiet, it will remind white people that they were too scared to go and they will feel bad. Use this only in emergencies."

Check out the website for the full list. Seriously I highly recommend the read, incredibly entertaining. Although I am slightly upset they only featured Dave Eggers burried in a post about David Sedaris.

It's an illusion Michael, tricks are what hookers do... -Gob

So I am writing today with great excitement. Not only do I have a new apartment that is $200.00 less than the one I currently reside in, but it looks like one of the great sitcom apartments. You know like in Friends, the girls apartment, that there is no way in hell they could afford in real life and was clearly decorated by some hipster set designer. Yup, I am living that dream.

Also thanks to good old Helen E. I have discovered a new love during the writers strike, Arrested Development. No I wasn't cool enough to watch it way back when it was actually popular but at least the wrong has been righted and I can now enjoy the Bluth Family hi-jinks (is that how you spell hi-jinks anyways, oh well). Everyone already knows I have seriously mad crush on Michael Cera and Jason Bateman so this was bound to be gold. Needless to say I love Momma Bluth and her signature wink (see above) because it reminds me of my own mother dear old peg leg.

Back to the amazing apartment. I was going to attach some pictures but my work computer hates all forms of creative expression including music and photographs. (I blame it on the fact it is a PC). So pictures will come shortly when I can get back to my house and actually upload them to this here blog-thing. Needless to say it is pretty darn spectacular for the price and the location. Be very jealous of me. That's all for now, until next time remember "There is always money in the banana stand!"

Craigslist + Apartment Brokers = lies, lies, lies.

Apartment Search number 7. Yes 7 count em'. I have lived in this lovely city of Chicago and in those 7 years have lived in 7 different places. Include twice moving in a year time frame. I am soooo sick of scanning lying craigslist adds about apartments. When they say vintage they mean old p.o.s., when they say modern, they mean modern in the sense it was redone when dynasty was on tv and my all time favorite "loft like" because they knocked out one wall and your bedroom doesn't have a closet. How the hell does no closet and taking away a wall make it loft like. I've been in plenty of lofts with closets.

I lived on my own for 6 months, and although I thoroughly enjoy it, apparently making a good salary in Chicago doesn't mean you will live like you make a good salary. 1,000+ for a 1 bedroom is painstakingly impossible for me at this point in my life, and that excludes utilities. Yes I live in a nicer neighborhood, closer to public transportation and work, but honestly that is ridiculous. My brother advised me to buy a place. I told him that he was crazy, he just bought a 4 bedroom gorgeous restored 100+ year old home for what I would buy a shoe box, perhaps with my kitchen in another room, no guarantees.

Don't get me wrong even in the dead of hell winters in Chicago, I love this city, and the people in it. So I pay the price to live here. Which means having a roommate, who lucky for me is pretty cool, and realizing that I will never have a washer and dryer anywhere close to me. It's like that Sex and the City episode (sorry for the overtly girly reference) when Aiden says to Carrie: "Tomorrow the appliance guy comes to put in the washer/dryer." To which Carrie responds: "Oh, that's been my dream my whole New York life!" I don't think I will be living that dream anytime soon.

So instead of dreaming of a sweet loft in the south loop with my washer and dryer and heck lets throw in AC and a dishwasher, I am going to go search through the lies on craigslist and try to find a decent place. Hopefully one where you have a door between your shower and your bedroom.